Baring the Left Hand Again

I have suddenly realized that things change when you don't wear some kind of bling on your left ring finger anymore. Coming from a situation where I had a ring of some type there for five years, I am starting to remember what it is like again.

I am one of those girls who will definitely flip you off and send a vocal "f#*k you" following if you mess with me when I am not in the mood. Luckily the day I heard "Hey, you left your smile on the sidewalk over there," from a kid who was probably in the statutory stage for me, I just gave him a stay the hell away from me glance and went about my day.

So far, many others have not received bad reactions either, but it still catches me off guard when my 40 lb bag of dog food sparks conversations with men now, the visit to the bank, ordering take out, breathing. I mean, they haven't uttered a word in five years afterall. Does a ring really represent the end of all communication with those of the opposite sex who don't already know you?

Now, there are the mullet haired asses at the bowling alley, when you are enjoying a night reminiscent of high school, who just don't care if you have nothing on or a 5 carat stunner that could blind them for life if angled correctly in their direction. This happened one night when I was still taken, and the cat calls and full body scans from this group of Milwaukee's Best drinking skeezes was just too much. Luck would have it that the small and unintimidating significant other at the time and I didn't seem to act like a twosome, so I flocked right to his brother-in-law, who Bics his head and always carries a gun, for some necessary scare tactics. Linking my arm through his, he quickly did the trick, shooting them down with his steel eyes and a glimpse of his piece up under the corner of his shirt. Their parties in the back suddenly scrunched up in fear to their neck lines, and they became good boys for the rest of the night.

So now I am in the process of trading in all my "ex" jewelry for a new right hand ring. The one that screams, "I am independent" but also "I can switch this to my left hand temporarily in emergency situations." And I may just do it while they are midsentence with me and fully aware of my action. I am guessing I will get to do that a lot for a while now.